The effect of frequent socializing is that it fills the heart with the smoke of anfaas of humans until it becomes black, causing it to be scattered, torn apart, worried, upset, and weak. It causes it to carry what it is unable to from mu’nat evil companions and waste what is beneficial for it, by becoming too preoccupied with evil companions and their matters to attend to what is beneficial. (The heart instead is busy with) scattered thoughts in the valleys of their requests and wishes. So what remains of it for Allaah and the life to come?
How many adversities has mixing with people brought and how many blessings has it repelled? [How many] trials has it caused and opportunities disabled, raziyyah caused to fall in baliyyah. Is aafah the downfall of people caused by other than people? Did Aboo Taalib at the time of his death have anything more harmful to himself than evil companions? They remained with him until they blocked him from the one statement that would have guaranteed him eternal pleasure.
This socializing based on love in this world, the fulfillment of desires from others, will change into enmity when the realities become manifest, and some of those who socialized will bite their hands in regret as the Almighty said:
“On the Day when the sinner will bite his hands saying: If only I had taken a way to the Messenger. Woe to me, if only I hadn’t taken so-and-so as a close friend. He misguided me from the Remembrance after it came to me.’ And Satan is forever a deserter of humans in their time of need.”
(Soorah al-Furqaan, 25: 27-9)
He (SWT) also said:
“Close friends on that Day will be foes of each other except the God-fearing.”
(Soorah Az-Zukhruf, 43: 67)
And He (SWT) said:
“Indeed what you have taken besides Allaah is only idols. Love between you is only in this world, but on the Day of Resurrection you will disown each other and curse each other and your abode will be the fire and you will have no helpers.”
(Soorah al-‘Ankaboot, 29: 25)
That is the state of those who share goals, they love each other as long they help each other to achieve it. But if the goal is cut off, it is followed by regret, sadness and pain, and that love will change into hatred, cursing, blame of one another, and the goals change into unhappiness and punishment, as is witnessed in this life in the states of those who share in failure, if they are caught and punished. Each supporter of falsehood, friendly regarding it, their mutual love must eventually change into hatred and enmity.
The useful defining principle in the matter of socializing is that one should mix with people in [acts of] goodness like Jumu’ah, the ‘Eeds, Hajj, learning knowledge, Jihaad, giving advice; and avoid them in [acts of] evil, as well as unnecessary permissible things. If necessity requires mixing with them in evil and avoiding them is not possible, then beware, beware of agreeing with them. And be patient with their harm, for they must harm him if he does not have power or a helper. However, it is harm followed by honor and love for him, respect and praise for him from them, the believers, and from the Lord of the worlds.
Thus, patience with their harm is a better ending and a more praiseworthy conclusion. If necessity requires mixing with them in unnecessary permissible things, he should strive to transform the gathering into one of obedience to Allaah if it is possible, he should encourage himself and strengthen his heart, and not pay attention to the satanic whisper of discouragement which will prevent him from that, that this is Riyaa’ [showing off], a love of displaying one’s knowledge and state, etc., he should fight it and seek help from Almighty Allaah and try to affect them as positively as he can.
If destiny prevents him from that, he should remove his heart from among them the way a hair is removed from dough. Among them he should be present yet absent, close yet far and asleep yet awake. He should look at them and not see them, hear their words but not be conscious of them, because he has removed his heart from among them and ascended with it to the uppermost hosts (Al-Mala’il-A’laa) glorifying [Allaah] around the throne along with the pure celestial spirits. How difficult this is and trying for the souls, [yet] it is easy for whoever Allaah makes it easy. Between a slave and [that state] is that he be truthful to Allaah – Blessed and High – continually seeking refuge in Him, and that he throw his soul on [Allaah’s] doorstep in humility. Nothing will help him to do that besides sincere love, continual remembrance of Allaah with the heart and tongue, and avoidance of the remaining four corrupters to be mentioned. He will achieve this except with righteous preparation and strong material from Allaah – Most Great and Glorious – and a truthful conviction, and freedom from attachment to other than Allaah, Most High. And Allaah Almighty knows best.