Riyadh, June 09: I was asked to reflect on Arab women—but also women in general—seeking attention.
My first reaction was that this “seeking attention” business resonates like a personality disorder…I did some research and this is what I found:
“This disorder is characterized by a pattern of excessive emotionality and attention-seeking, including an excessive need for approval and inappropriate seductiveness, usually beginning in early adulthood. These individuals are lively, dramatic, enthusiastic, and flirtatious. They express strong emotions with an impressionistic style, and easily influenced by others. Associated features may include egocentrism, self-indulgence, continuous longing for appreciation, and persistent manipulative behavior to achieve their own needs.”
And I thought, don’t we all behave this way one way or another? I mean not in a “sick” way! Women and men—O.K., maybe women more—tend to seek approval from other women and men. Regardless of our social background, country, culture and age, don’t we all do that (and not just Arabs)? Why would we look at mirrors if not looking to approve our reflection? And I firmly believe that women and men with or without clothing restrictions (as per society or family requirements) are more inclined to add a touch that would make them stand out in a way or another.
For women, it could be a statement bag, sunglasses, big rings… Men, by wearing specially made cufflinks, a Rolex watch, colorful suspenders and of course driving a low-slung sports car (like a certain non-Arab middle-aged, plump editor I know).
I always advise women around me when looking for fashion tips, to find their own style. Once they know exactly where they want to be, how they would like to be perceived, what’s the image they would like to project for others, working on self-confidence is the next step. If a man or woman lacks self-confidence, then their style will never bloom. They will never look and feel different, and I think it’s important for all of us to stand out from the crowd and not be just another individual.
With the proliferation of reality shows, and all these candidates craving for recognition in a way or another, we should read it as a sign of survival and uniqueness in our globalized modern times.. They want to have their “15 minutes of fame,” to feel that they’re “someone” not just anyone.
In our constantly growing, moving and changing world an individual can be totally lost and feel lonely. We need to feel that we belong to a group, that we’re perceived in that particular way. Women in this part of the world are blessed. We’re pampered by our parents since childhood and throughout our adulthood, and that is priceless. To feel loved and appreciated is what we all in a way or another look for it. So a cute head tilt, a subtle body leaning, a beautiful outfit, a clear loud laugh, noticeable accessories are all meant to reassure ourselves and integrate graciously into the harsh life scene. Exactly how I decided to start my day, wearing a bright colorful with flowery prints dress by See by Chloe, Jimmy Choo suede stack heels (to elongate my silhouette), my heavy Stam bag by Marc Jacob and a BIG smile! Can’t beat that!
Do I want attention? Why not? (I get it anyway.)
–Agencies