London, December 29: Muslims and humor? You cannot be serious? As the seeker of truth and justice I ventured down to the Apollo in London’s Hammersmith to catch a glimpse of this very widely held notion of a rare phenomenon.
Billed as “the official Muslim comedy tour,” I am in search of proof in the shape of three Muslim comedians. Yes, I said that right – not one, but three ‘Muzzle em’ comedians.
“You got a better chance of collectively breaking bread with the Abominable Snowman, Sasquatch, and that creature from the depths of Loch Ness”, the voice in my head muttered.
I had heard a lot and read a lot, after all, the trio is arguably the undisputed Muslim comedian heavyweights in the world – and they were here in London for one night only.
True to star billing form, the show kicked off twenty minutes late, not surprising considering the punters zoomed into their seats with barely 30 seconds to go. The Apollo was very much empty one minute and one mad rush later it was packed to the rafters. “Kicking off late true to Asian form,” I chuckled and updated my Face book.
Holding the Stage
The evening kicked off with Palestinian Mohammed “Mo” Amer, the youngest member of the trio. 9 year old Mohammed fled his birth country of Kuwait during the Persian Gulf War. His family eventually settled in Houston, Texas. “The FBI is coming, we know, the FBI is coming – whereas my uncle calls them the Fibbie. The Fibbies coming
“The who? The Fibbie wala, the Fibbie, the Fibbie, the Fibbie – the Fibbie’s coming…”
Mohammed shares his fear of pronouncing the name Osama. It transpires that on one occasion his nephew Osama runs off in the shopping mall. Nervous, he can not bring himself to shout that THAT name – “Samee!”,
“That was a good one huh?” he asks the audience.
“Saamee!, come here.
“He looks at me and shouts No! MY NAME IS OSAAAMAAA!
Frenzied with embarrassment he whimpers; “Shut up, you know how many people hunt in Texas, shut up!”
Allah Made Me Funny (AMMF) co-founder Azhar Usman is up next. An experienced comic, Azhar has shared the stage with many of his favorite comedians including Dave Chappelle, Jim Gaffigan, Russell Peters, Todd Barry, and the late Mitch Hedberg.
Azhar hilariously talks of the India-Pakistan rivalry. During a recent visit it transpires that an Indian in Delhi being hospitable hands Azhar his business card – “Just you calling me – on my mobile only,” he shouts to stomach clutching screams from the gallery. This I must say, is a truly Asian joke, the non-Asian members looked confused and many laughed at those who were laughing at what seemed rather a lame gag.
Azhar described his love for Indian movies; “I love Bollywood, and I have watched all the Indian movies – I mean you seen one, you seen them all.”
Using his microphone stand as a tree Azhar then performed his very own version of a Bollywood dance – Hrithik Roshan, you are safe… for now.
Azhar had the audience in further fits, when he described how his father had refused to shell out on a pair of Nike Air Jordans for him; “$100? You can get the same product in India for $5,” he rebuked.
Sure enough the family visit India and Azhar is treated to a trip to the grand bazaar in Patna. Dad is on the ball and takes young Azhar to the shoe store, where lo and behold, there it is – the very same Nike Air Jordan. “You see, son,” beams Azhar senior.
“Everything is fine, the quality, color, size,” reminisces Azhar. “All until you look close and notice that the “Nike” logo is actually spelt “Nice.”
This was a particularly poignant gag for me, as I had a mate at school, who returned from Bangladesh with a nice pair of Reeboks. Everyone was envious. It eventually turned out that an “e” was missing from the logo, leaving him with a pair of “Reboks”.
Preacher Moss is the co founder. There is a swagger about him. He is a born comedian, built to entertain. The type of entertainer who is simple, slight, yet deliberate facial expressions are enough to audiences to their knees. Whereas Azhar and Mohammed are energetic, electric and loud, Preacher compliments the trio as the quiet studious type.
“See, I am African American and Muslim. The United States is scared of two things: black people, and Muslims. I got the best of both worlds!” Referring to the hunt for Bin Laden; “That Osama Bin Laden must have some cave. All these years in the wilderness, that must be some cave, a surefire bet for MTV cribs.”
“£25 million” Referring to Barack Obama’s run to the Presidency of the Unite d States he added his own tint; “All ya Muslims out there, admit it. A man with Hussain as his middle name, with Muslim heritage gains the highest office!
“You got the look in your eyes, ya’ll be hoping, praying, contemplating.
“Right down till he was sworn in as President, ya’ll were hoping right?”
I noted the exit of a lot of white audience members. As they walked out, and noticed the embarrassed expressions on many faces. Sure, they must have known that there would be a lot of self baiting, but being prepared and experiencing are two totally different entities.
Thus many walked out, clearly uncomfortable with the gags about Indians, Pakistanis, Somali pirates and black people – “Think black” Preacher Moss kept reiterating, cue thunderous applause and laughter.
The trio bought the house down – I laughed so much that I ended up with stomach cramps and the urge to grab an Asthma pump to curb the subsequent wheeze in my chest.
With much mirth, merriment and laughter, it was an electric show and the encore at the end, rightfully bought the house down.
Apart from the gags, the show was very educational. Allah Made Me Funny has a bright future. It makes you feel proud to be a Muslim – it is an opportunity for the true and human side of Muslims to be focused and highlighted upon for a short period of time. A massive thumb up to Pedro Carvalho and FNIK PR for co-coordinating a top class evening.
-Agencies